F...E...A...R...

F…E…A…R…

False…Evidence….Appearing….Real….

This past Saturday I had a situation crop up in my life during a conversation with a friend in my car as I was driving. During the conversation I became overwhelmed with fear. At first, thoughts of my past did grip me - a circumstance where I was exited out of a moving vehicle and had to walk home - did come back to my mind. However, I was completely safe and the physical reaction that rose up in me didn’t match the conversation, other than I was driving on the freeway at the time with my friend as a passenger.

Slowly, an old habit of anxiety came over me. In an attempt to thwart its existence and calm myself I became defensive - deflecting the conversation - in an attempt to make it stop. It didn’t work. I was unable to communicate what was happening and it just kept getting worse and worse.

The anxiety rose and it took a lot to pull into my destination. My breathing was all out-of-whack - I didn’t know what to do. Finally, I had to exit the car for a minute or two and take some deep breaths and separate myself and pray it off of me.

I was mad! None of it was real…I was perfectly safe. My friend had no idea what was happening…I was embarrassed…

I stood on the street outside the car and the Holy Spirit reminded me:

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love. 1 John 4:18

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." Romans 8:15

It went away.

I do believe that fear is the enemy’s #1 weapon in his arsenal against believers. If he can get us to fear, then he can help us fall victim to worry and other parts of sin… the “what ifs” then can plague our lives, almost becoming a paralyzing force (at least for me).

Yet fear is not tangible. We THINK something may happen and so we are fearful or a past situation or circumstance makes us think we are there again (as in the car situation with me on Saturday.)

Some would say I suffered a trauma and, thus, suffer from a sort of PTSD from past. Maybe so yet I only know that I can be transformed by the renewing of my mind according to the Word.
How on earth to we drive fear from us? 1 John 4 says that perfect love is what casts it out.

What is love?

He that loves not knows not God; for God is love. 1 John 4:8

Our Confession

Confession by definition means: –noun
1. acknowledgment; avowal; admission: a confession of incompetence.
2. acknowledgment or disclosure of sin or sinfulness, esp. to a priest to obtain absolution.
3. something that is confessed.
4. a formal, usually written, acknowledgment of guilt by a person accused of a crime.
5. Also called confession of faith. a formal profession of belief and acceptance of doctrines, as before being admitted to church membership.
6. the tomb of a martyr or confessor or the altar or shrine connected with it.
(taken from www.dictionary.com)

Sometimes, our confession changes, based upon how we are feeling at any given moment in time. Often times, we feel something (negative) but confess another (positive) when people ask us “how are you?” (I feel afraid…I confess “I am fine”)

Here are a few feelings…Do you recognize any of them? SELF-CONSCIOUS ANGRY UNHAPPY JOYFUL RESISTANT ANXIOUS OVERWHELMED DISCONNECTED LONELY AFRAID SAD WORRIED INADEQUATE STUCK UNWORTHY WILLING GRATEFUL HAPPY CAPABLE TIMID STUPID FAT EXPOSED IGNORANT TIRED PEACEFUL LOVED SCARED EMPOWERED.

Our feelings are a reflection of the state of our heart. When we say one thing and yet do not reveal the truth of how we feel, often an inner conflict is created within us. It creates a wound, if you will, a weakness, an inner debate or even a deception in the sense that we are not really being truthful. We become susceptible to doubt and fear and attack by the enemy to plant the seed of a lie in us. Our emotions then have an opportunity to be the filter of what we say. Soon enough we begin to rely upon the filter and unspoken emotions and feelings and it can become our truth….or our identity…we will totally believe it is truth!

Example, someone says: “how are you?” You say: “I am fine”. You are really struggling and want to ask for help but don’t. You leave feeling unheard and feel uncomfortable. You drive home and feel a little angry and alone. Over time your confession becomes “no one cares about me!” (If I say I am fat long enough, it doesn’t matter what the scale says, I FEEL FAT).

Seeds of lies become a filter, like glasses, in how we see and conduct ourselves. We receive these from many sources in life…society, family, employers, co-workers, well-meaning friends, even our church and communities plant seeds in us. The question is, how do we weed out things that are NOT truth? Furthermore, understanding what is reliable truth is the ONLY way to get rid of the lie.

Who is the author (father of lies?) (John 8:44)
How do we find truth? (John 16:13)

The Power of Your Confession:

“What a woman thinks about, she talks about; what she talks about she brings about” -Pat Fortenberry

It starts with what we think. It starts in the mind. The mind is a battlefield of conflicting thoughts.

So, what’s on YOUR mind?

The Battlefield:

Ephesians 6:12: “For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.”

The Mind:

Romans 12: 2: “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Ephesians 4:23: “To be made new in the attitude (or spirit) of your minds”

James 1:8: “a doubleminded man, unstable in all his ways.”
James 4:8: “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye doubleminded.”

The Mouth:

Matthew 15:11 - What goes into a man's mouth does not make him 'unclean,' but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him 'unclean.' "

Matthew 15:18: But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean.'

Luke 6:45: The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.:

What Have We Learned?

We are in a war and the battlefield is our mind. Satan is our enemy and he uses diligent tactics, strategies and lies to create a deliberate deception.

We often do not express how we feel, but instead stuff our emotions which creates inner conflict. We cease to be authentic - who God made us to be.

Seeds planted by the enemy become filters through which deception takes hold - our thoughts become unclean - tainted - muddy
We can renew our mind by choice through the One who is Truth - Jesus!

Hooray! It is within OUR control to renew our mind!

This week, I will focus on all that I AM (through Christ) and not on what I am not. I will take time to be still before the Lord to ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to me my patterns of thought/speak/confession.

No Fear in Love

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. - 1 John 4:18...NIV


1 John is probably one of my favorite books in the Bible on love...it has spoken to me most of my Christian walk, as an example of how God's agape (love), or His emptying out and self-sacrifice (definition of agape) has driven out fear and emboldened me to continue to seek to be made perfect in love.


While I have extrapolated this verse, it really is much bolder in context of the entire book of 1 John.


Today the Spirit is speaking to me about speaking truth and love and that they are one in the same = JESUS. I think I have often, out of fear to appear offensive, or because i felt that I had a "plank" in my eye, that I was unable to speak truth...I continue to realize that I must speak truth and that the Word is truth. Doesn't matter how I feel about it, if I like it or not; doesn't make it NOT truth. I have spent a lot of time justifying why that shouldn’t be truth, and many years side-stepping around the fact that it IS true and suddenly I am finally submitted to the fact that not only IS it true, but one of the main problems in many lives is simply that we don’t want to say the truth, and we definitely don’t want to hear (or like hearing) the truth. OK, so I am guilty, Father and I beg forgiveness!


Selah……

 If I withhold truth or do not tell you the truth, especially out of fear, then how is love perfected in me? Am I so concerned about how you will "feel" about it, that I am silent? Do I speak truth, out of my love for you, my concern and for your welfare, or do I sit on it and remain silent (tolerance) so that I do not offend? (Insert healthy fear of God on my part here because of what I will have to give account for when I stand before Him).


In all of Scripture I don't see that Jesus....I mean I see the Jesus who speaks absolute truth in love which is His motivation but He is speaking, He is not silent....


My prayer and confession for today is:


May I have the courage Lord, to be the truth, follow Your truth, and speak Your Truth, despite the planks in my eye, to my Christian family out of reverence to You lest I appear on Judgment day and give an account for my sin of not speaking.


Love is the only thing that remains...it remains more than my faith or my hope according to 1 Cor 13. It is the greatest of these three things.


I may be a broken vessel, Lord. I may have a huge plank in my eye, but grant me courage to not let that deter me from speaking Your truth. You tell us that if anyone professes that Jesus Christ is Lord that he is from God.


Then, Father, let me acknowledge that in everything that is spoken to me....that I will search for what You would have for me, and ignore the vessel in which you bring it to me through. Let it not be about how they speak it, but only that I hear YOU in it.


Likewise, let the Truth you give to me, by speaking Your Word, be edifying and bring about fruit and I thank you that your Word never returns void, in Jesus’ name, Amen!


My heart hurts…


When, oh when, church, will we begin to speak the truth, regardless of the offense? When will we stop running around with itching ears seeking what feels good and sounds good and calling THAT truth when that is just stroking our egos and our flesh?


I pray personally that I am no longer afraid to hear the truth and to be perfected in love as this verse says!


Thank you, Lord!

Am I THAT Transparent?

This week someone said to me in passing conversation that I was “transparent.”  So, of course, being the analytical woman I am, I had to drag this with me into the throne room and have a conversation with my God about it and ask His opinion.  One of the best things about my relationship with my love (Jesus) is the fact that anything I bring into the throne room and talk about in communion with Him; He will take me seriously and answer my questions and communicate with me via His Spirit.  Just that intimate sharing and trust with Him and knowing that He will always answer me is so comforting!


So, I asked Him, am I THAT transparent, Lord?  His answer?  I HOPE SO!  My response was, “huh?”


[trans-pair-uh nt, -par-] –adjective
1. having the property of transmitting rays of light through its substance so that bodies situated beyond or behind can be distinctly seen.
2. admitting the passage of light through interstices.
3. so sheer as to permit light to pass through; diaphanous.
4. easily seen through, recognized, or detected: transparent excuses.
5. manifest; obvious: a story with a transparent plot.
6. open; frank; candid: the man's transparent earnestness.
7. Computers . (of a process or software) operating in such a way as to not be perceived by users.
8. Obsolete . shining through, as light.


After reading this definition of the word transparent I got to thinking about being transparent so that rays of light can be distinctly seen, recognized, and detected.  Am I, as a believer, transparent in my daily life?  Not in what I say but in WHO I AM?  Am I open, frank and candid about Jesus?  Am I obvious?  Can everyone see the light of the Holy Spirit shining in me?  Do I keep his commandment and love, without expectation or agenda but just because He asked me to?  Even when it is taken for granted or stomped upon or not returned….do I honor Him?  Oh boy, some tough questions for me.


Today, in my quiet time this morning, I had a few verses come to me.  Here they are:


Proverbs 10:12:  “Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs.”
Proverbs 17:9:  “He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”
1 Peter 4:8: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.
John 13:35:  “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."


Philippians 2:13:  “so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe”. (in the context of don’t grumble or argue)




The antonym of transparent is SECRETIVE.  Do I have ulterior motives other than to love and hold those in my life with the utmost respect?  Is that obvious?  Am I genuine?




I had to laugh and thank Him for my time in the throne room today because now I know the answer to the question: “Am I that transparent, Lord?:  My answer?  “Man, I HOPE SO!”